Posts tagged ‘religion’

August 7, 2013

Day 575: The “New” New


Remember that time that I sorta went off the healthy eating reservation and struggled with food, and subsequently my weight, for several months…

Okay, for seven months…

And then when I finally snapped to about a week ago when I did a four-day Daniel Fast (which has turned into a twenty-one day Daniel Fast), I realized…

Wow. I gained quite a bit of weight during those seven months of struggle.

Cue: Time to get down on myself. Time to beat myself up. Time to question God’s plan. Time to cope by eating more. Time to reprimand myself for sinning. Time to cower before God’s punishment.

Only… this time that didn’t happen. Cause ya know why?

Cause I am new.

Yes, I know. New… once again.

I was new a year ago when I first started the covenant, and I coasted off of that newness for 365 days. Until I decided, in my infinite wisdom, that I could be both the old me and the new me.


But now, I am a “new” new.

I have learned even more about God and His plans and His thinking and His ways.

His ways aren’t my ways.
My ways aren’t His ways.

I know now that after this 21 days that there will be another 21 days and another 21 days and another.

And I know now that after those 21 days, that this lifestyle of eating will continue until I transfer my residency from Earth to Heaven.

Because I have realized that God wants to heal me… not for just a year, but for a lifetime.

God, I want a permanent healing. Not just a year. Not just five years. I want to be fresh and “new” new forever. You see, these seven months I’ve been just holding on. Holding on to you. I’ve been depending on You, God; knowing that you are everything I need. Keep loving me, God, with all you’ve got— that’s what I’ve been depending on. Psalm 33:20,22 And now I keep holding on, but I feel like now I’ve let you pull me off of the cliff and that we are, once again, walking together. Help me stay waking with You, God. Amen.

June 1, 2013

Day 508: More Than Saved

saved from more than death

You know when we Christians hear the phrase ” I am saved” we so often just think immediately of someone that believes that Jesus is Lord in their heart, said it out loud with their mouth, and so now they are saved (Romans 10:9).

POSITIVITY: I am saved.

Even though I was dead because of my sins, he gave me life when he raised Christ from the dead. (It is only by God’s grace that I have been saved!) Ephesians 2:5

Ya know… Jesus has saved us if we believe in Him. But Jesus has saved us from so. much. more.

He has saved us from a life of sadness. of hopelessness. of powerlessness.

He sent us the Holy Spirit to guide us towards a full life, an abundant life, a life with hope and a future. He gave us strength and wisdom when we ask.

It reminds me of a few of the stories (and sadly, there are only a few) from when slaves were officially freed in America and there were some “masters” that gave their former slaves food, land, and money to get started on their own. Not only were those slaves “saved” from being a slave but they were also “saved” from starting life out on their own with absolutely no help and only a bunch of animosity from the whites as most slaves were. But this is what Christ has done for us… he has saved us from oppression of the worst kind and has provided us with the tools to life a wonderful and complete life.


Lord God… I cannot fathom what it means to really be a physical slave. Honestly, I hope that I never fully understand that truth because I know how difficult it has been to be a slave to my own sin… to be a slave to temptation… a slave to the devil’s wiles. It has been a slavery that has wrapped my soul in pain and sorrow.

But today I remember that it shouldn’t be that way any more. Today I remember that you have saved me. That you have given me life… real life… full life… abundant life. A life that is FREE from the pull of food. A life that is free from the devil and pain and sorrow and worry.

Thank you Lord Jesus that you saved me from eternity in emptiness… in separation from You and all that is Good. But thank you God that You also sent Jesus to show me how to fully live. You are my abundance!


May 30, 2013

Day 506b: A Slave No More


Ya know, yesterday on Day 505, I was supposed to write about the positivity of being free.

I tried a bunch of times to write on it, but I just wasn’t… feelin it. (And for good reason.) If you read the post I wrote just moments ago (Day 506a: Childish Conviction) then you’ll see why.

Sin. I wasn’t feeling free because I was still WILLINGLY going back to sin and asking to be its slave. But my little interaction today with my son was like someone spiritually grabbing me by the shoulders and shaking the snot out of me and saying WAKE UP!!!! YOU ARE A SLAVE BUT YOUR SHACKLES ARE OFF! WHY ARE YOU STILL WORKING FOR THIS MASTER? GO! GET OUT OF HERE! BE… FREE.

And I am.

I. am. free.

POSITIVITY: I am free.

Now, I am free from my slavery to sin, and I have become a slave to righteous living. Romans 6:18

I never understood before I started this covenant journey how restricting myself (a la “becoming a slave to righteous living”) would be FREEING? It just didn’t make sense. Until I actually went through that process and realized that last year I was so incredibly free from food once I restricted my foods with God as my help. Then… enter the turn of the year from 2012 to 2013 and my introducing chocolate back into my life.

Big mistake. Huge. HUGE.

However, I can thank God tonight that He has taken me down this road AGAIN to remind me AGAIN of this truth. Because since I ate that first bite of chocolate in January… I have been enslaved to it again. As I reached out that night to taste my first bite of sweetness, I shackled my tender, tender soul back to the vice that has held me captive for so long.

And now, I should probably expound on that to you guys, but I’d rather just talk to God about it in my prayer.


Oh my God… how wonderful you have been to me today. How you have reached out yet AGAIN to redirect me. I can be nothing but thankful… no, wait, I can be more. I have hope and freedom once again God. Even as I walked into the house and was immediately assaulted with the all-too-familiar thought of “Hmmmm, what can I snack on?” I smiled God with such peace because I knew that I was free again.

And on that note… wow. Thank you for making confession and conviction SUCH an effective tool in redirecting me. Thank you for using my sweet little boy to speak a dagger of truth into my heart. Oh my Jesus, I needed Your Sword of Truth to cut me clean down the middle so that You could put me back together again. And Hallelujah you did it!

I just feel so full of hope and excitement as I look forward to more and more days and days of peace in my heart as you empower me with strength and the ability to resist these morsels of the former me. Lord Jesus, be close to me now. Stay sooooo close by my side… even now, I can sense that sneaky snaky devil searching in my armor for a weak link. Guard me God with your angels… protect me from evil even if just for a few days while I get my sea legs again. Allow me to be a glory and witness to you as I muddle through this covenant journey.

Oh just THANK YOU GOD… that is all I have tonight. Thanks. Thank you… thank you for this freedom. Thank you.

And a Hallelujah Amen!


May 29, 2013

Day 505: Incapable Capability


I really don’t have words this morning.

This is the eighth draft I have started for this post. I’ve changed the positivity verse three times, but I just can’t seem to get anything to work for me this morning.

Ironically enough, look at what I ended up with for the positivity verse…

POSITIVITY: I am capable.

I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength. Philippians 4:13

You see, I wasn’t able to write a post because I was being nit picky about my wording, about my anecdotes, etc. But really… we don’t need a bunch of “my words” today… all we need is that truth right there.

I am capable.

I can do everything.

I have been given strength.


God, it’s funny… this morning as I write and pray to you, I feel so terribly incapable. But I am just reminded it is because I am so incapable… without You. And, oh God, how often I attempt to function without you. And how often I fail epically because I attempt life without you.

But now… now I remember God that You make me capable. You make me able to do things that seem unimaginable. Sometimes that’s eating right, loving the unlovable, healing over deep hurts… but when I use YOUR strength… I am suddenly able.

Today, God, help me to tap into that strength. Remind me over and over again that I am capable with You. That I can do anything and everything with You. That I am strong with You. Help me to triumph today over sin and sadness!

You alone are God. You alone fulfill. You alone are strength and hope.

May I focus on You. alone.


May 28, 2013

Day 504: Unfinished Business


You know, I always wanted to be an artist. I mean, I guess I sorta am an artist as a writer or as an actress, but I mean, like, an artist in the painting/drawing sense of the word.

I have medium skills at drawing (my dad is a wicked amazing artist so I had some of it in my blood), but nothing to write home about. Once I went to one of those paint in a group what the lady tells you kind of deals (Painting With A Twist) and had a great time.

What I found interesting was that the teacher knew just what the final painting was to look like but we “artists” were just sorta following blindly at times, doing these strokes that seemed sorta odd at the time but would end up being the background or the shading or something. Several times I liked the way it looked and wanted to stop there, but then she’d walk us through a few more steps and we’d end up with it looking even better.

And today as I think about my positivity that “I am unfinished” this painting experience comes to mind. There are times in my life when I think, “God- what is this you are doing with me right now? This is all wrong!” But then afterward I see that the trial or tribulation or simply just a weird road he took me down was just Him putting some shading on me or creating some amazing background. Ya know- things that make sense… later when I’m looking back on them in hindsight. And other times I’ve thought “Oh this is it. I’m just where I want to be. I’m done growing.” Only to realize months later that I was nothing but a sketch at the time. Devoid of color or depth.

So I’m remembering that today as I question a stroke here or there of God’s or if I want to say “Oh forget about it- this is as good as I’m gonna get.” INSTEAD I am going to remind myself…

I am unfinished.

POSITIVITY: I am unfinished.

I am certain that God, who began the good work within me, will continue his work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns. Philippians 1:6


God, ya know… You are an amazing artist. Whenever I look around at creation I see amazing things… the ocean in and of itself is just stunning and the mountains are so… wow. Sunsets. Huge swaying trees. All amazing. And that’s just creation! Looking at my children, I’m in awe again. And some of the smiles and laughing eyes that you have made… awesome.

Today as I started the day I was feeling so terribly inadequate. so beat down. But God, your reminder to me that I am UNFINISHED and I feel so much better. Every “mistake” is actually just an incomplete brush stroke… thank you so much for allowing me to be seemingly imperfect while you perfect me. Thank you for not giving up on me as I try sometimes to take the brush from your hands and do the job myself. Thank you for even thinking me worthy to be a potential masterpiece. Your love is almost overwhelming!


{Good thing God is a
better artist than me! Ha!}


May 27, 2013

Day 503: An Ode To My Mother-In-Law


You’ll have to forgive me for the lack of elaboration on today’s post. On a whim, we ended up spending the night at my in-laws place in the country and so I didn’t have my laptop and cell reception out here minimal, at best.

Well, my mother-in-law just sent all the boys up to their other house on the property so she and I could have some down time. I’m potty training my 3 year old and was getting… frustrated… so I think she could tell I needed a break. Gotta love a good mother-in-law and boy howdy do I have a good one!

Anyway, that is a pretty good tie in for today’s positivity verse.

I’m not one of God’s chosen people by lineage or birth. I’m, technically, a gentile.

Just like I’m not my mother-in-law’s daughter by birth or lineage. I’m, technically, a stranger.

But just as my mother-in-law has pulled me under her wing to care for me, and give me gifts, and help me, and love me… so did my God. And honestly, she treats me as her very own daughter. Just as God treats me as one of His chosen people of Israel.

You see, my mother-in-law loves me because her son loves me. Because he chose me to be his bride.

And God is able to love me because His Son loves me. Because He chose me to be His bride.

I am loved.

POSITIVITY: I am loved.

God did not spare even his own Son but gave him up for me, won’t he also give me everything? … Christ Jesus died for me and was raised to life for me, and he is sitting in the place of honor at God’s right hand, pleading for me.

Can anything ever separate me from Christ’s love? Does it mean he no longer loves me if I have trouble or calamity, or are persecuted, or hungry, or destitute, or in danger, or threatened with death?

No, despite all these things, overwhelming victory is mine through Christ, who loved me.

And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate me from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither my fears for today nor my worries about tomorrow–not even the powers of hell can separate me from God’s love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below- indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate me from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:31-39


God, You are the sweetness of my life. You fill me with Hope and Love when I feel there is nothing but frustration and despair. You love me- Your Son came for me- You embrace me into Your family.

Help me today to honor Your Love with the thoughts that pass through. Help me today to honor You through my actions and my words. May You be honored as I treat my family with respect and kindness. As I care for my body through careful controlled eating. May my life be something that makes You smile today.

I love you. In my best way, I love you. Thank you for accepting my love, God.


May 26, 2013

Day 502: I’m Full Of It


{Get it? Full of it?!?! Haha!
Full of goofiness, that’s what!}

I have really been looking forward to this one.

If there is one thing that I think most of us struggle with, it is the feeling that there is something missing… something wrong… something off with the way we are. And ya know, I’ve heard these two verses a gajillion times and wow… they are so true:

You created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. Psalm 139:13-14

But since I have heard them so many times I think I’ve almost numbed myself over the years to the power of that truth, so today I want to focus on really INFUSING that into my mind and heart. I don’t want to just HEAR those words… I want to live them! And ironically enough, I’m going to do so using a different verse that says a similar thing.

POSITIVITY: I am complete.

In Christ lives all the fullness of God in a human body. So, I am also complete through my union with Christ who is the head over every ruler and authority. Colossians 2:9-10

Like, we always think about Jesus as “The Perfect Man” (not in the marriageable meaning of that phrase though… although pretty sure he woulda been the bomb of a husband)… ya know, He was sinless. But more than that… He was AWESOME. No, seriously. I mean… think about the stuff he did. Like, telling his disciples to chill out and let the kids come sit on his lap and get blessed. Bringing back his best friend,Lazarus, to life. Eating and hanging out with sinners that would, according to the temple tradition, make him unclean. Touching lepers who hadn’t felt a hand on them in yearrrrrs. Telling Martha to cool her jets because it was better to be like Mary and just BE with Him. Saving the adulterous woman who was about to be stoned to death. And my favorite… stopping dead in his tracks to acknowledge a woman that had just reached out in faith to be healed.

And I’m not bringing up any of those things to focus on the miracle aspect of each of them… but to point out just how FULL OF LOVE He was… and is.

But then also think about the miracle parts… bringing a dude back to life? allowing a woman to be healed by touching his ROBE? And then there’s always that whole coming-back-to-life thing that is pretty cool, too. All of that points out just how FULL OF POWER He was… and is.

Like the verse above says, I am also made complete through my union with Christ. Which means I am FULL of that same LOVE and I am FULL of that same POWER.

WHO CAN STOP ME!?!?!?!?!?

Okay, so I meant that kinda funny… but also, kinda for real. I mean… WHO CAN STOP ME?!?!? No one… not even Satan because I am united with Christ. I am complete.


Lord God, wow I am PUMPED to talk to you right now! Cause after remembering all that up there, I am just like… WOW… LET’S DO THIS THANG! You are just so rad to give me the chance to get in on this deal of being part of the Kingdom of Heaven here on earth… I think of myself as just a little goofy kid down here but once I realized just now that I am made COMPLETE through You, in You, because of You. I don’t know… it just changes things for me, God. I feel so… so… spiritually unstoppable! And I guess, that’s not really a false place to be in. I am spiritually unstoppable!

It actually brings tears to my eyes to realize that there is NOTHING MISSING in me. Remind me all day today God that I am made complete through your Son, Jesus. From the top of my head to the tips of my toes, I am full. Full of You and Your radiant awesomeness and beauty. Oh Jesus, that I would FEEL that way today and KNOW today that it’s true. May my life be full and complete as You are full and complete!


{When the boys saw me
making my “full of it” pic,
they wanted in on it!}


May 25, 2013

Day 501: The Chosen

How about a few reminders first of the past five days of the 30 Day Infusion?

Day 1: I am made for more!
Day 2: I am royalty!
Day 3: I am new!
Day 4: I am cherished!
Day 5: I am strong!

POSITIVITY: I am chosen.

I didn’t choose Jesus… Jesus chose me. He appointed me to go and produce lasting fruit, so that the Father will give me whatever I ask for, using the name of Jesus. John 15:16

Ya know, my husband liked me first.

It’s true.

He might not tell it that way, but it IS true. I was dating someone else and my husband started to pursue me before I even thought about a relationship beyond friendship with him. And I had done my fair share of… chasing… boys in my lifetime because despite how AWESOME I was they were just not interested in me. Mom always told me it was because they were intimidated by my awesomeness. So honestly, it was so nice to be sought out. pursued. desired. chosen.

Yeah… chosen. And Jesus has also chosen me. But for two reasons… He chose me simply to be with Him and glorify Him, but also He chose me, like it says above, to “go and produce lasting fruit”. I have a calling… a purpose… a point in being here. And He has chosen me to give strength, He has chosen me to cherish, He has chosen to make me new so that I can produce LASTING fruit, He has chosen me to be royalty and to act like it, and He has chosen me for MORE than just a plain ol life here on Earth!

I am chosen!


God… You are good to me and you bring me hope and promise and love and fulfillment. With You I can do all these things that I thought were impossible.

Thank you for choosing me. Thank you for allowing me to be a part of your plan, and thank you for giving me skills and power. Thank you for making me all that I am and all that I can be and all that you are going to make me. I love focusing on these cool things that you have put in me: strength, love, newness, regality, worth. Help me to focus on those things throughout the bumps of my day. Remind me especially today that I am chosen to live a life that will still have worth for eternity.

Love you so much God! Thank you for my life today.


May 24, 2013

Day 500: Strong Spirit

Gonna admit… I’m starting my writing of this on what is technically Day 498. It’s just that I got such encouragement from the positivity (I am new!) and prayer (Draw me closer to you, God) today and so I wanted to get ahead a little bit to make sure that each day coming had that positivity and prayer already set for me.

POSITIVITY: I am strong!

God has not given me a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline. 2 Timothy 1:7

Honestly, this is one of those verses that I have heard a gazillion times and so at this point I sort of just let it slide through my brain and then trickle down into long term memory. And in true pessimist form, it’s probably because I so often focus on the first part of the verse. All I hear is “fear” and “timidity”. But as I focus on the positive aspects today I just zone in on the second half of what He HAS given me!


And really, what a wonderful spirit to have… a combination of power, love, and self-discipline!?!? How cool that He threw those three together into a combo! But really, those three are THE things that I would want! Power… to stand up for what is right and to do whatever God calls me to. Love… to balance the power so that I don’t just run over everyone and everything with power but that I am kind and caring and patient and all that stuff from 1 Corinthians 13. Self-discipline… honestly this one almost throws me off at first as to why it’s in there, but then again, no, it belongs there. For what is power and love is all the more powerful when controlled.

PRAYER: God, You are strength. You are power. You are love. And you are self-discipline. Thank you for giving me all of these things as well. God, please remind me that I already HAVE all of these things! I need to know that you give me the strength to resist things, and well… not just to resist things, but also the power to be above those things. Remind me today God that I have the power to focus on You. to keep my mind on You and Your… awesomeness. to think about the things of eternity instead of things of the earth. Help me to see over and over again that You and Your Words and Your Love is lasting and fulfilling. Keep my eyes lifted to you today God. And remind me that I am strong! Amen!


May 23, 2013

Day 499: Cherish The Love


Can I just say that I love being positive and praying?

Cause I do… love it.

Yesterday I got back on track with my 30 Day Infusion and wrote the post Day 498: Newbie and I just used those thoughts all day long! Whenever I was tempted with something food-wise I thought, “I am a new person!” and when I could feel myself starting to obsess about food, I prayed, “God just bring me close to You today. I just want to focus on You.” It was just so nice to look at that leftover bite of chocolate covered granola bar and instead of saying “Don’t eat it! Don’t do it! Turn around!” I was able to, instead, say something positive to myself, “I AM NEW! YOU ARE NEW, JANUARY!” I actually feel GOOD about myself instead of crappy.

Anyway, on to today’s:

POSITIVITY: I am cherished.

He is so rich in kindness and grace that he purchased my freedom with the blood of his Son and forgave my sins. He has showered his kindness on me, along with all wisdom and understanding. Ephesians 1:7-8

How wonderful to feel so important that God purchased my freedom for me… with His own SON! That He showers his kindness on me! I just picture Him ever-so-gently holding my life in His all-powerful hands and smiling with contentment that I am His. WOW. I am cherished. And dang, ya know… I would have loved to really tap into that mindset earlier in my life. I can picture now the girls from high school that knew that they were cherished by God. So long I spent searching for some guy to cherish me (not denying that it’s not nice to have my husband cherish me now). But now I can remember that I am cherished now no matter what I do. that I’ll still be adored and fawned over by God because I am cherished by Him.

PRAYER: God, YOU are awesome. You are just everything that I need even when I don’t know that you are all that I need! You are the One True Love of my heart and I adore You. Thank you for buying my freedom from sin and sadness. Thank you for just cherishing me as a precious part of the existence You have created. Continue to pull my eyes toward you God. Call out to me when I take my gaze away from you and remind me of your Love of your Greatness and of your Power! I truly long only for You, God. I just want to have my days be a moment-by-moment interaction with You. Please, help me make that happen today. Thank you for cherishing me. Thank you for making me new. Thank you for making me royalty and for making me for more than just earthly junk. You are what I want! I love youuuuu! Amen!

And if you want to know where I came up with the title for this post, you can watch the video “Cherish the Love” from the 80s by Kool & The Gang if you want some laughs. It’s purty cheesy and it has nothing to do with this post other than it has the word “cherish” in the title of the song! Ha!

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