Day 531: God Has Ruined Me

I feel like I’m on the cusp of something great.

Like… last year was really, really great.

This year has been… good.

And good is, ya know… good.

But it’s realllly hard to go back to “good” when you’ve been great.

And I just feel like there is something big about to happen in my life. Now, I’m not necessarily saying something good is about to happen in my life, but something big. I know that God uses all kinds of things in our lives to drive us closer and closer to His Purpose for us… and I know that God uses all kinds of things to spread His Name and His Glory. So, I’m up for whatever. But I think I’ve kinda been… ruined.

I can’t do just… good.

Not anymore.

I need to be greatly used by Him now.

Annnnnnnd, here’s what’s… haha, great… about today’s positivity. Guess what it is?

POSITIVITY: I am ready.

Dear brothers and sisters, whenever trouble comes your way, let it be an opportunity for joy. For when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be strong in character and ready for anything. James 1:2-4

When I see the word endurance, I automatically think of my brother. He’s this super-athlete that enjoys running insane distances. We joke that he got all of the athletic endurance and I got none (although the older I get I realize it has far more to do with his willpower than it does with any physical genetics). Anyway… I’ve gone to many-a-race to watch him run and I’m thinking particularly of his half-Ironman race a few years ago. A half-Ironman is as close to chosen-insanity as I can imagine, but he loves to push himself. After his race, we watched videos and looked at pictures. As my brother told his race story, and as we watched him run by… exhausted… I sorta redefined my image of endurance.

{Speaking of image…
this is my bro in one of his many races!}

Austin Endurance

I think we often think that endurance is just someone running along without struggles. Endurance is not about continuing at the same pace. Endurance is about simply continuing. It’s about pushing past the limit that your body tries to tell you is there. It’s about, for a runner, throwing up while running to keep going and not stop. It’s about limping as you cross the finish line even though you have been running the past 5 miles with a blister. It’s about running through shin splints, cramps, pulled muscles.

And that’s sorta where I feel I’ve been the past few months… sticking to it while I struggle. even though I’ve stumbled. pushing through trials and temptation. But, I’m still here. I have not given up. I have kept faith that God will carry me across that finish line… I may be exhausted, but He and I will. finish. this. race.

So, today, I look at the calendar of coming days and weeks, and I know that this race has been testing my endurance and developing it, so that I’ll be strong in character and READY… ready for anything.


God… I’m just so… excited! I know that the next chapter of my journey might be perilous and crazy and unexpected but I’m just so excited to be GOING on a journey. I’m so excited that I’m still ON a journey with You!

Thank you for giving me what I need to be ready. Thank you for all of the trials and whatnot that I’ve gone through over the past few months as I limp through this race. Thank you because it has shown me that it is about endurance and making it through with You.

I’m ready… ready for whatever path You are ready to take us down. I have this weird surge of faith and hope and trust for you lately and maybe that is why I’m so ready to… just DO IT!

Above all God, I ask that I keep my eyes on You. You made this faith that I rely upon. Help me to maintain the right focus… one that is all about you and not about being skinny. Help me God, every moment of every day.


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